"Heard Over the Bar"


Everybody's talking 'bout
Sus-pension, no pension, criticism, gamemanshipisms
One game, or two games, six games, no seven games,
All we are saying - Give Metta World Peace a Chance
All we are saying, is give Metta World Peace a Chance

C'mon, Evry'body's talking 'bout
Anger, smanger, Wilbon crappin' - Barkley yappin'
Stephen A screamin', Skip Bayless reaming - clueless and gutless;
All we are saying, is Give Metta World Peace a chance
All we are saying, is Give Metta World Peace a chance

Let me tell you now,
Everybody's talkin' about
No solutions, playa' revolutions, TV viewin' and ratings spewin'
Was it the Reffing, left wing, wild fling, every spring
Mitigation, Litigation, mediation, Harden shaking, no congratulations,
All we are saying, is Give Metta World Peace a chance,
All we are saying, is Give Metta World Peace a chance.

Everybody's talkin' bout, Pau and Kobe, Stu and Stern
Five game, six game - no 7-gamer, no concussion, not a Russian,
Tony Parker, Bobby Simmons, Rodney Stuckey,
James be lucky, Karl Mailman, Al-Farouq, Omer Asik,
Beaubois, Lobo, Ilysova, Iguodala, Mbah A Moute
Amar'e is goofy, Hare Krishna? (make it)
Amar'e, Amar'e Krishna

All we are saying, is give Metta World Peace a chance
All we are saying, is give Metta World Peace a chance.

 -- Albert Neri II - with all due respect to John Lennon

***

With the Olympic torch on its way to London, Winston Wolf chimed in with his commentary on Mount Olimpia: "I thought Johnny Weir was the Olympic flame."

***

"The J-E-T-S decided to sign Tebow after his physical revealed perfect feet."

 - Albert Neri II

***

The new Tiger Woods book says he considered quitting golf to become a Navy SEAL.  "Hey, Tiger, Bin Laden wasn't hiding in THAT kind of bunker."

 - Winston Wolf

***

Unconfirmed reports claim baseball arbitrator Shyam Das has Ryan Braun in a keeper league.

***

"Picking the Republican candidate is like picking the ace on the Mets pitching staff" - Ken Dashow

***

Some favorites (and oldies) from the PGATour and its TV personality, David Feherty:

“Fortunately, he is 22 years old so his right wrist should be the strongest muscle in his body.”

“That ball is so far left, Lassie couldn’t find it if it was wrapped in bacon.”

Jim Furyk’s swing - “It looks like an octopus falling out of a tree.”

“He’s (Luke Donald) a bloody walking ATM.  I slid my AmEx between the cheeks of his ass and out popped $500.”

"That's a great shot with that swing."

"It's OK - the bunker stopped it."

At Augusta 2011 - "It's just a glorious day. The only way to ruin a day like this would be to play golf on it."

"That was a great shot - if they'd put the pin there today."

***

Famous last words:

"I know I've been drinking too much when the "Check Liver" light comes on."

 

Powered by Ace Marketing